Perimenopause: learning to listen to your body
At 41, I’m beginning to think about perimenopause a little differently…
It's no longer something that feels a long way off or something I'll need to understand eventually. It's becoming a conversation I'm having with myself as well as lots of the women I train daily too.
I’m lucky enough to work with women of all ages and chatting to them about their journeys has made me realise just how varied those experiences can be, and how many of us are navigating similar questions without necessarily knowing where to start. The more I learn, the more I realise how important it is to understand what might be happening in our bodies, so we feel confident asking questions and know that we don't have to figure it all out on our own.
For some women, the changes are obvious. For others, they're subtle. And for many, they can be a confusing combination of things that are difficult to join up. I'm interested in understanding more about what happens during this stage of life, how we can recognise the changes and, perhaps most importantly, how we can learn to listen to our bodies along the way.
When things start to feel different
Perimenopause can bring changes to our menstrual cycles, sleep, mood, energy and concentration, amongst other things. And because these changes can be gradual, it isn't always easy to recognise what's happening.
I've been thinking about how easily we can put things down to being busy, having a lot on our plates or simply getting older. Sometimes, of course, that's exactly what it is. But it has made me realise how useful it is to understand a little more about what our bodies are going through, rather than automatically dismissing changes as something we just have to get on with.
I'm not suggesting that every bad night's sleep or afternoon slump is hormonal. But knowing what to look out for gives us a better starting point for understanding ourselves.
The art of noticing
If there's one thing I'm taking away from learning more about perimenopause, it's the importance of paying attention.
Not in a way that means analysing every little thing or adding another job to an already busy day. More a gentle curiosity about how we're feeling and whether anything seems to be changing.
How are you sleeping? Has your cycle changed? Are you feeling different in yourself? Is the exercise you usually enjoy feeling harder than it once did? Are there patterns that you've started to notice?
These aren't questions we need to have immediate answers to. But they might be worth asking ourselves from time to time.
I've always believed that understanding the why behind what we do is important, particularly when it comes to our health. And I think that applies just as much to understanding our bodies as it does to understanding how we exercise or nourish ourselves.
Keeping a simple note of any symptoms or changes to your menstrual cycle can also be helpful, particularly if you decide to speak to a healthcare professional. Sometimes, seeing things written down makes it easier to spot patterns that might otherwise pass us by.
There isn't one menopause experience
From speaking with so many women also going through it, and those who are out the other side, I appreciate just how individual this experience can be.
Some women experience a whole range of symptoms, while others notice very few. For some, the changes are unmistakable; for others, they can be much harder to identify. Perimenopause can begin at different ages, too, and there isn't a single timeline that applies to everyone.
It's easy to compare our experiences with those of friends, colleagues or women we follow online. Hearing other people's stories can be reassuring and help us feel less alone, but it can also leave us wondering why our own experience looks different.
I think it's important to remember that someone else's experience doesn't have to mirror ours for either of us to be going through something real.
We don't need to fit a particular picture of perimenopause to deserve support, and we don't need to wait until things feel unbearable before asking questions.
You don't have to figure it all out alone
Learning to listen to our bodies is one thing, but we don't need to become our own healthcare professionals in the process.
If you're noticing changes that concern you, or symptoms that are affecting your everyday life, it's worth speaking to your GP. There are different ways to manage menopause symptoms, including treatments and lifestyle approaches, and the right support will depend on the individual.
It's also worth remembering that not every change we experience in midlife is necessarily related to hormones. A healthcare professional can help you explore what might be going on and whether anything else needs investigating.
I think there's something reassuring about knowing that we don't have to work everything out ourselves. We can be curious about our bodies and ask questions without feeling that we should already know the answers.
And where does exercise fit in?
As someone who works with women and fitness every day, this is a part of the conversation I'm particularly interested in.
We know that regular movement, strength training and looking after our overall health can be valuable throughout midlife and beyond. But I also think it's important to recognise that our relationship with exercise might need to evolve as we do.
There may be times when we feel full of energy and ready to challenge ourselves. At other times, poor sleep, busy schedules or changes in how we're feeling might mean we need to adapt our approach.
That doesn't mean giving up on movement. It might mean prioritising strength training, allowing more time for recovery or finding a routine that feels manageable rather than trying to push through a plan that no longer works for us.
And if you're finding exercise harder than usual, you don't need to assume it's simply a lack of motivation. It's an opportunity to get curious, consider what might be contributing to the change and seek advice if you need it.
For me, this is another reason why I believe exercise should be about so much more than how our bodies look. It's about supporting our health, maintaining our strength and helping us feel capable in our everyday lives, whatever stage of life we're in.
A little more curious, a little less critical
I'm still learning about perimenopause myself, and I certainly don't have all the answers. But the more I read and the more I think about this stage of life, the more I feel that understanding our bodies is a good place to start.
We spend so much time expecting ourselves to keep going, to manage everything and to carry on as we always have. Perhaps there's something to be said for pausing occasionally and asking whether what we're doing still feels right for us.
Not to overanalyse every change or to assume something is wrong, but to approach ourselves with a little more curiosity and a little less criticism.
At 41, I'm beginning to see this as an opportunity to understand my body better, rather than something to worry about or put off thinking about until later.
And if you're starting to ask similar questions, I hope this is a reminder that you aren't alone in doing so.
We don't need to have everything figured out. We can start by paying attention, asking questions and giving ourselves permission to learn as we go.
Sometimes, simply understanding a little more about ourselves can make all the difference.
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